Lia tells our fortunes
After Argyrios graduates, he will write a wonderful magnificent book after living in Athens for several years. He sends his book to many publishers but nobody will publish it. Slowly he becomes a smelly, crazy homeless man, with a beard that doesn't look too good. How dare the world ignore his brilliance! So, one day, he's walking down the side of the road and there's this Scrabble tournament and he thinks to himself "I think I'll play" and he wins the Scrabble tournament and 500 dollars. Almost over night he is transformed into a very famous and wealthy scrabble player, and then the publishers decide to publish his book. Argyrios is overjoyed! In the meantime he is marrying and divorcing many older women, each older each time, and they're all named Lola. Most of them have red hair. Well, theres one that he likes alot, and they're on a ship on the ocean, and Lia has come to visit him with her half-monkey child who is coincidentally named Lola and has red hair ( the fataher was an orangatang). Well the next morning they all wake up and Lola (argyrios's wife that is) has been drowned! Argyrios suspects that Lia's child has done the killing, but he says nothing ,adn every night his tormented wails can be heard: "Looooooooooolaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! Lolaaaaaaaaaaaa!" He is in pain, and all the Lola's have smeared together in his head into one big red-headed Lola who he loves but cannot have. Seeing Lola (Lia's child) every day is slowly driving him crazy and he is more and more convinced that she is the one that killed his beloved Lola. Late one night, Lola slips out of her room and into Argyrios's room in an attempt to seduce him, for she has loved him all along. In his sleepiness and fragil state of mind, Argyrios kisses her thinking she is his wife. But his dead wife who has been watching all this time saw the kiss and did not know! In an angry rage she drags Argyrios under water and he dies a tragic death at the age of 41.
Samia's story is also a tragedy, though she lives almost a century longer than our poor Argyrios. Perhaps it is even more of a tragedy because she lives so long and so many tragic events happen to her. The story starts out cheerily though. She graduates wiht a degree in Biology! Finally, after 13 long years she has accomplished what so many thought she could not. Although she is 30, when this happens, she is hopefull that life will treat her well. Her heart is filled with joy for life. And within the darkness of her skull ideas were brewing. She was in love with protein folding. Beautiful amino acids! She loved them, but it was all the love in her life for a long time.... So, Samia is a graduate student recearching similarities between chicken blood and tyranasorous rex blood. One day in the small yet sunny office that she inhabits, a beautiful new person comes into her life. His name is Romeo! The curtains are blowing in the wind. They look at each other through the fish bowl, and fall deeply in love. He sweeps her away! To another room where the curtains are also billowing in the wind. But then Samia realizes the terrible truth. Romeo is a midget. The next morning, no one is happy. Romeo leaves. Samia has many more strange love affairs, but all of them are brief and unsatisfying. She is a lonely scientist, all by herself, in a cold and dark world. She attempts to cure cancer and fails. Finally, she decides that she will go to a sperm bank and get pregnant. She ends up finding an unlabeled bottle and takes it. It turns out to be Dr.Oakes's child - her phyiscs teacher from college!! It's a very strange baby with a big head and it looks like an old man even as a new born, but is exceedingly intelligent in the area of nuclear physics and talks alot about explosives. This worries Samia some.
Lia will become an astronaut on a mission that has monkeys aboard to observe their behavior. She is a dashing and daring scientist with dark thoughts and ideas that torment her mind - too big for her to keep to herself! The question has been there for a long time - since her college years, when she sat upon the bed in Samia's room and watched "Friends" and inquired into the uninquirable. She must copulate with one of the orangutans! The human race is dying, and so are all of the other life forms on earth. Samia would think this is good. So, late one night when the other astronauts have gone to sleep, Lia goes to work. She must do this for the posterity of all life. She finds a fairly good looking monkey, but the monkey is confused. So she shows it some "monkey pornography." For the love of science! Well, there was accidentaly a video camera recording as they took the monumental step, and Lia became the first woman to be impregnated by a primate other than human.
The video was distributed on earth, and humanity thought it was horrible. Yet they loved it! And made copies and distributed it so that it could be seen by all. Lia gave birth 8 and a half months later, to a girl that she called Lola, and Lola was brilliant. She could compute integrals in her mind, more complex than any current or past living being on earth was capable of. But the scientists wanted to take her away and disect her brain. Lia's mothering instincts told her this was wrong, very wrong. She could hear them in the other room, with their scalpels, about to cut her child's brain open, in the name of science. She scoffed. Science! Is this what it has done to us? Has it torn all the humanity and grace from us? Are these the wounds we must bear? NOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Lia let out a ferocious roar. She would not let this happen. She jumped out of the bed that she'd been laying in and the IVs ripped out of her nose. With her nose dripping blood she burst into the room and fought the surgeons. She was a passionate warrior. She took her child and left - wounding only 2 doctors and unfortunatly killing the anesthesiologist with a scalpel blade.
After escaping the hospital she went into hiding for several years. This was possible because the United States was no more. It had been liberated from the life-sucking capitalism under which it had suffered for so many years. By Aleex! Alex, she laughed quietly and smiled and shook her head. He was the new hero of the new age! Alex Knox, that dumb freshman.
Alex grew long dreadlocks and painted them multicolored. He became a very good unicyclist, and inspired many people to give up their lives in a race for more and more possesions. People flocked to hear him speak about fields of flowers and universal brotherhood and sisterhood. The world is at peace for the first time in it's history - everyone sharing and loving.
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I'll finish the story later, I have to go to sleep.
